we have officially lost it.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Randomize
