You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."�
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Randomize
