youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
My dad just said "fuck circus"
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
