wake up i wanna do it froggy style
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
