so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
That was an excessively violent trivia night
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize
