Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize
