i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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