Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
