My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
