She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
