KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Randomize