I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
only if we run a train.
done.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Randomize
