Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
