erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
babies were throwing up all over the place
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
