wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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