lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
