I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
my god I love twenty year old dicks
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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