Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
