I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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