what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize