Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
