I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. �Hello 29...
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
