I'm really into asian looking animals
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Randomize