Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
