Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
