never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
