what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Randomize
