i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
