Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Come see our sink grown plant.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
