It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Randomize
