did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
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