sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
