We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize
