How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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