How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize