garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Randomize
