No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
