id be glad to
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
