I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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