2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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