Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
