You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
