you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Girls should come with a carfax report
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Randomize
