So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
It's never too late to be topless.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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