Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
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