wrigley field is MILF paradise
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Randomize
