i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
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