Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
