singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
