i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Randomize
